Part 3- and the end of a dream

God was working. I was working. Brian was feeling back to normal and we were new parents to twins. Things were great. Keep reading... I promise I get to the point.


I was trained in Hospice... but the training honestly...wasn't the best because I was trained by the person with the least experience and most opinions and questionable acts. But I put a smile on my face, sucked it up and got through it and ended up getting my caseload really early. Though I didn't know much about what I was doing, I was all about learning, and LOVED the work. Hospice was great, the people were great, life was GREAT.

Then along came C. Remember her? My friend? Well keep reading.
C asked if I could cross train again in Home Health because she was just "swamped" and really could use my help. I didn't mind helping and remember- I liked C and home health. Sure I will cross train again while I am still training in hospice... because it will help you out and help me to reach my goals of moving up and doing a good job. So it was set up to cross train with C and fill in in home health while I had my own caseload in Hospice. My hospice co-workers said it would just be too much and deep down I knew it would but I really wanted to show that I was a good worker and worth keeping past PRN. So while training for both positions one morning I sat down with my hospice coworkers to chat in our usual morning meeting... C came around the corner and just started YELLING at me in front of everyone. I coward like a child and I was almost in tears but I told her I would be at her desk to help her soon. When she walked away, my trainer and I went to see my hospice boss Jim.... told him what happened and he agreed that C was difficult to handle and along with everyone else warned me about her. Nothing changed. I continued to do both hospice and home health and had to do Home health work often because the nurses told me they preferred me- not to brag but you would just have to know C... she was hateful, mean and degrading to everyone except her close friend Mary. I saw a total different side of her than when I was a student. I did what I was supposed to do and didnt ask her any questions... eventhough I knew what she did was wrong. I received an award of Exellence from Teresa-the big boss for doing both positions so well. I was excited and honored.
She would put me down, talk down to me , order me around like she was a drill Sargent... make rude comments about Brian and where he worked... why? good question... I never figured that out... I think its because I was content in my marriage and she had been divorced because her ex didn't make enough money-her words. But lucky for her she found a doctor....whom she was about to marry. So a year goes by, hospice is great but the census(the numbers) were dropping...yes people die but we just weren't getting very many referrals. People were going with our competitors. SO by October 2010 I was approached by Cindy and told a FULL time secure position was going to be opening in home health doing Home health, palliative care and hospital liaison. I didn't really want to leave hospice because I LOVED it and I told her I was hesitant to do so....well Teresa- remember her - the big boss? Well she told me my hours were going to be going down in Hospice because of the census and asked me to apply for the Home Health job because I would be great at it and work great as a team with C and Mary. I said I would think about it.
I didn't want to do it, everything in me wanted to just stay in Hospice and let my hours drop then worry. I was hesitant to work with C because she was so mean- seriously and because the things she did to her patients... like doing nothing or not going to visit them like we should- I didn't agree with that.
C kept following up with me ... I finally told her I was hesitant because I loved what I was doing and she said" well I dont know why we created this position when you dont even want it... I mean why have it?!- in a very condescending" I got this position FOR YOU" voice.
So despite my bad feelings. I applied for the job because yes I needed full time work- I had a family... and afterall-- she lead me to believe they created the job for me... it would be awful for me not to take it. I interviewed. I got the job. I started end of November 2010.
My nightmare was just beginning. My training was horrible. I was set up to do things so her and mary could laugh at me when I didn't know how to do something or felt uncomfortable doing. I was told to " get some balls" I was talked down to, comments were made about my hair, my clothes... etc... yeah sounds like high school right!- I cried on my lunch breaks and to my old co workers, I cried at home to Brian. Brian even experienced her attitude when she came to his work place and showed her colors. If you don't know her... some of this may be hard to picture but ... she was a bully. She didnt visit her patients she pushed them off on me...which was fine because I LOVED seeing the patients. She didnt really train me with the Liaison piece of the job and she didnt do anything in Palliative care so she didnt train me with that either. I was not set up for success, I was set up to be C's punching bag and secretary to do the work she didnt want to do so she could leave at noon everyday... and she did.
Finally one day. I had enough. While in tears I went to my boss(Teresa's) secretary to schedule an appointment with my boss. (By this time it was January.) My boss was not available. The secretary said to me " is it C?"- off the record?" I said "yes" she said " oh tabitha, everyone knows, Teresa knows how she is, leave a voice mail because C will be in Teresa's office if she knows you are here." So I left a voicemail with my boss, and tried to schedule, she did not call me back or anything, I was off the next day which was a Wednesday. On Thursday the first thing I did was go to Teresa's office to talk to her and she "was not available" so I went to sit down.. 2 seconds later C and Mary come around and corner me in my cubicle. They start asking me questions and talking down to me and I firmly said " I don't feel comfortable with this, I would like to have a boss present." Mind you my boss never returned a call or a message. So Mary is on the phone and gets an appointment with Teresa within 5 minutes(less than 10 minutes after I tried to get a meeting). We go into the office and I just start crying then I apologize for crying and just start laying it all out there, everything that had been said etc. At first, before I said C's name... I just kept saying she does this and kept things general. Teresa at first said oh Tabitha noone thinks those things of you then when I said it was C... the attitude changed. The three of them, Mary, Teresa,C ganged up on me. Teresa made me apologize but not C. It was awful. I was traumatized. After everything... what little training I was getting was completely stopped. ...C and mary would make up excuses and I was too scared to go above Teresa's head after everything that had happened the last time I stood up for myself. Stupid me didn't realize the three of them were friends and C was married to a Doctor... anyway... so I continued to be pleasant and just acted as if nothing happened and ate their mean attitude everyday. I put up with the whispers and snickers... then on FRIDAY March 4th (when everything bad happens) I was pulled into the office by Teresa and HR rep and told that I didn't pass my training with C. I was told I was not a good fit for the team-which that part I don't argu because they just wanted to take advantage of me) and I was told ....get ready for this... (I almost want to laugh)... THAT I COULDN'T MULTITASK!!- are you kidding me.. I worked both jobs for how long? God gave me twins...obviously he disagrees with them. I was told that the company was letting me go because of this. WHAT!
I began to hyperventilate, almost throw up, cry and then I became upset. I said that I didn't agree with any of it and this was all because I turned C in to Teresa for Bullying. I was asked by both of them to take this job and suddenly... I am not fit for the job? WHAT!? I stood up for myself, in a very professional way, I refused to sign anything.... they knew they didn't have grounds because for everything they said I had a counter. They knew what they were doing was wrong and they acted nervous. As I packed up my desk all I could think is what my sister had told me weeks earlier when I was in the battle " the lord will fight for you and you have only to be silent."I left with my tail between my legs and a burning in my throat and tears in my eyes, my stomach felt relief, my heart broken, my mind still trying to piece it together, I carried my boxes alone in one trip in the rain to my car. Shaking.
Brian was home with the girls, I cried to him as I told him what happened. He screamed lawsuit, I screamed heartache and worry. The company tried to deny my unemployment but I was smart... I kept records, and remember that AWARD OF EXELLENCE... I kept it, I kept the emails... all of it. I was approved for unemployment. I found a new job... not where I really want to be but its a job. My dream with that company has slightly faded because my heart is so broken. ALL of my coworkers except mary,c and teresa have rallied around me with nothing but support and love. They all know the truth without me opening my mouth- thats telling isn't it?.... its sad to me that people like that can hurt people and go on. I am not the first person C has done this to and I know I wont be the last...she has power. but one day she will face our God. So, I do nothing. I don't sue, I don't file a grievance because everytime I try there is a road block so I think God is saying... don't do it. I am still eligible for employment there however, Teresa said not in HOME SERVICES (Hospice, or Home Health) which is where I love to be. But recently, Teresa was DEMOTED. So the Lord is again at work and I wait for his plan. I tell my story to those important to me and on here because not many people read this but I need to get it out. Thinking about it brings up the anger again but I truly believe God was saving me from the oppressive hurtful environment with C. I believe that he has a bigger plan for me. I am still healing and somedays I forgive them... somedays I don't... its a process... because no matter what you think about someone... NOONE deserves to be treated this way. I don't know if I will ever go back to that company. ... even if Teresa and C are gone because Teresa is on her way out... and C... who knows. This is just part of my story... Im not writing it... God is. I just wait for guidance.