A reminder to be careful what you wish for.

Some wonder how I can still look at these pictures. The answer: God. This is all part of my story and he is writing it. We lived. The girls with out a scratch and I had very minor cuts on my hands and a few small bruises and a little bit of glass in my eyes and mouth and of course the seat belt left a lovely hickey looking mark on my neck. We were saved. There is no doubt in my mind that he was there that day. I didn't hit another car. The girls were spared and we move on with our life. The person who stole my camera has not come forward. Yes I know they stole it...it wasn't lost in the accident because it was in a duffel bag where nothing else but my camera, camera charger and iphone charger are missing...no clothing no perfume or make up... just those items.I am sad for the loss of the memory card...not the camera or other items.

I found a generic iphone cord so I was able to load my iphone pictures and it works. We heard from the insurance company and hope to get things wrapped up quickly.

The windshield... well the glass was originally still attached but must have fallen at some point...proving to me that it was not fully intact because it buckled in the center... it was not glued in place correctly.

I know that much worse could have happened. My friend wrote on my facebook post that I am a "Billboard for Jesus" and a woman at Bible study said that she admired my faith and that I inspire her. I do not feel worthy of ANY of these comments. I am just human and thankful to be typing this.

I say becareful what you wish for because I tend to be a "negative nellie." Always wishing for something better... if you look back in my post I complain about my camera, my granny mobile, my old house. Look. I no longer have my camera... that though it had a cracked screen and worked best in sunlight... it worked. I no longer have my "granny mobile" or the "Lazy boy" on wheels as my husband and I called it. It was a good car, good to drive, good to ride it, big, safe and we were not upside down on it(just upside down in it, ha?)... all material things. I didn't like the camera becasue I thought it should take Better pictures, I didn't love the car because it was in my eyes "ugly."

My lesson. Be content with what you have... I know , I know people say this ALL the time but truely. Be content with what you have. because you never know. Material is just material and when that day comes God is not going to say " ok pick your top 5 items and bring them with you"

This is a lesson for me. TO try to be more positive. TO not keep wishing I had this or that which I know alll of us do. At some point I will be posting pictures of the girls again. At some point I will have another camera and another car. But I will only have one Lillian and one Joelle, One husband, one Daisy, One dad, One Mandy, Jessi, Bryana, Kelsie, Grandma... all my friends...that is what I need to focus on. Learn from me and my mistakes. Because we are living proof there is a God and his team of angels, I all but saw them that day, but I felt them. They were very much there and very REAL.

Cause there's a bigger picture

Just when I thought we were moving on and on the up hill slide....they decided to remain in the toilet. While I have been praying to God for Flashing lights, Billboards and arrows to the path he wants me to follow... I didn't mean flashing lights via AMBULANCE. Nor did I need to have my name broadcast on television. I am a wall flower and I am just fine with not being noticed. Our world came crashing down (again).... literally on Friday April 8. I was so excited for my weekend trip to Iowa to go see my family and friends and enjoy myself and relax and have family time. I had my Sonic Dr. Pepper for me and sippys with white grape juice for the twirly birds, bags packed Ginny Owens in the CD player. Driving down the road, thinking about the shopping I am going to do with my sisters when I get to Iowa, thinking about what type of outfit to buy for my new job... and thinking about that annoying/ scary sound coming from my newly replaced wind shield... what is that?... I didn't even have the opportunity to make it out of Buchanan county. We just had the windshield replaced in my car two days prior because of a spider web crack... well when I started driving down the Highway I noticed a lot of whistling and rattling... like the windshield was going to be sucked off by the wind.... well my mind tends to jump to worse case scenario so I thought "oh Tabitha ignore it, its fine, maybe just hasn't quite settled, just turn up the radio." So while passing a lovely gold car I reached down to turn up the radio ... why I don't know ?...(because the controls are also on my steering wheel)....anyway out of the corner of my eye I thought I was drifting too close to the car I was passing(hind sight I think I was actually fine) so I quickly turned the wheel.... a little too much and...the car took control over its self. While this song is playing, I hear the tires squeel ,I feel my car toss and turn and bounce, then just when I think its over, my car starts rolling and rolling, glass shattering , things in the car being tossed around, I am screaming help us! My babies, no! Please God. I turned to reach to the back of the car as we start rolling. When we finally stop on our wheels...thankfully I hear the girls crying and what a blessing that was! Witnesses run up to our vehicle trying to get me out- we couldnt get my door open and I am just screaming "I have two babies I have two babies!" The good samaratin opens the passenger door and I am able to climb out half crying, shaking, in shock, unable to really focus...( I may have blacked out for a second... I'm not really sure. )anyway the police and ambulance arrive, the good samaratins bring my luggage and all other items that had scatterd across the Highway back to my car. We are loaded up in the ambulance and taken to the local hospital. My neck and back were hurting... The girls don't even have a scratch. The fire department and state patrol said they have never seen anyone strapped in so well. They said they should have taken a picture of what it is supposed to look like after an accident. Yes I am a carseat nazi and proud of it. This Saved my girls life.

Yes, we will be buying two more just like it.

After x- rays, scraping glass out of my eyes and mouth we were discharged. While leaving the hospital I told Brian about the song that I had playing in the CD player. I told him that this verse kept going through my head... "Cause there's a bigger picture you can't see You don't have to change the world, just trust in Me 'Cause I am your creator, I am working out my plan And through you I will show them, I Am "

God is talking to me. I know that to some of you - you think.. yeah right you are crazy but honestly silly things happen to me.... usually in dreams. I had dreams I would marry a Brian, I had dreams about having twin girls. But this song... is God's voice. I know it is. He is amazing. I am scared. I hope nothing else happens but I also hope my story can help others, I hope I continue to hear his voice.

I will keep you posted on all the happenings around here. GOd is working BIG in OUR LIFE. Can't wait to see whats next, because he is writing my story... maybe not how I pictured it.. but I know this is all for him.

oH by the way. .... ALL of my luggage, pack n plays, stroller, pillows toys... everything was recovered except... someone from the towing company went through my duffle bag and stole the only 3 valuable items I owned... my camera, camera charger and my iphone charger... so needless to say it will be awhile before pictures are posted... either I have to get an iphone charger or a new camera. The thing that makes me the most ANGRY is the fact that the theif stole my memories.. the memory card in the camera, take all that ...fine just give me back my memory card :(